THAT Kind of Princess

I realized a couple days ago that I want to be a princess still. Kinda like when I was a little girl.  I want to be a princess as much as I want to be a saint.  But before you roll your eyes, hear me out.

I don’t want to be the girl that everyone thinks is just so beautiful.  I don’t want to have the glamorous gowns and sparkling jewelry.  I don’t want to be waited on, hand and foot.  But I do want the prince, and the epic, heroic moment.

I have always pictured this epic moment as one of those scenes where the prince is valiantly fighting for his princess, because he knows he has someone worth fighting for.  But in a sudden turn of events, the enemy has the upper hand.  Things don’t look so good for the prince.  Now the princess gets her heroic moment where she runs in to save him, and she turns everything around.  Because of her courageous action, the prince is able to get up and finish the fight.  They’ll have won the battle together, because they did it for the good of the other.

A friend of mine recently told me I remind her of Belle, from Beauty and the Beast.  I thought it was an awesome compliment, to be compared to a Disney princess.  So I compared my story to hers too.

Belle is an only child to a single father.  He ends up being a prisoner in the Beast’s castle, but with a self-sacrificing act to save her father, Belle takes his place instead.  She doesn’t know it, but the Beast has to get her to fall in love with him, or he will keep the appearance of a beast forever.  Slowly, as he pursues her, Belle and the Beast fall in love.

But then the Beast also makes a self-sacrificing act in order to set her free.  His sacrifice allows her to really live, not live as a prisoner.  She goes on her way.  She can either choose to come back to him, or carry on as though he meant nothing to her.  But then, as he’s under attack, it becomes a matter of life or death.  She remembers their love for each other, and comes running back to him when the battle is raging on.

And so Belle just stands there, watching him get attacked, and she won’t run in there and help defend him.  She doesn’t even tell her family how important he is to her—she’s just too embarrassed.  She won’t stand behind her prince.  She’d rather pretend this isn’t happening.  She lets everyone else fight to save him, but she, herself, does nothing.

Just kidding.

She obviously doesn’t just stand by and do nothing.  But what a disappointing ending that would have been!  People would think she was a terrible princess.  Would she really be a princess at all?  But I realized that this is how my “princess story” tends to look.

I’m just the girl who stands by and watches as the Prince is under attack, too afraid to say anything.  Everything He stands for is being persecuted, but I so easily feel embarrassed of Him.  I’m not a princess.  I’m not that courageous.

But I want to be.  Because I know He’s worth it.  He’s worth those moments where I charge in there to defend Him and say that I’m with Him until the end.  He’s worth those moments where I’m not afraid to say that I am Catholic, and say that I love God.  I want to be able to share my faith with my family, rather than feel embarrassed by it.  I want to be like Belle, who runs into the chaos to be beside her prince, in full knowledge of the battle that rages on around them.  I have always wanted that “epic, heroic moment” like I’ve pictured in my mind—but this IS that moment, but I haven’t been playing my part.

That’s why I say I still want to be a princess.  I don’t desire to fit the glamorous stereotype little girls think of.  To me, the word “princess” has a completely different definition.  She is the daughter of the King.  She is courageous.  She is not ashamed.  She stands for what is right, and stands behind her Prince through the battle.

I want to be THAT kind of princess.

That’s why I’m writing this post.  I kind of contemplated writing it for a while, but figured I would die of embarrassment if this kind of stuff were to get out.  So here’s an attempt at being courageous.  If I am supposed to be the daughter of the King, isn’t it about time I started acting like it?

 

“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.”

- The Princess Diaries

 

Andrea

Take time to pray!

Today is a gift, that is why it is called the “Present”

Dear beautiful sisters in Christ,

I have realized, in my own life, I am constantly looking to the future. I daydream about when I get married, when I have children, when I graduate from college, when I get a full-time job… the list goes on and on. Thoughts cross my mind such as,

“Isn’t it going to be wonderful to wake up in the morning next to my soul mate, my husband, and see him gazing at me longing just to say ‘good morning’.I wonder what it will feel like to look into the eyes of my new little baby for the first time. It is going to be exciting to get a job doing what I love to do and not having to go to boring classes anymore.”

It seems that life will not truly start until I get to these important times, which are always in the future and too far out to grasp. Listening to a talk last week during bisonCatholic week at NDSU brought me peace and understanding about my wandering thoughts.

Life isn’t about the ‘when’…life is about the ‘now’.

    Jesus wants to be intimate with me right now. He would not give me those deep desires and longings if He wasn’t going to fulfill them. My Lord and Savior is just waiting for me to bring them to Him and respond to His love. Every morning of every day, my Prince is gazing upon me, His precious daughter, longing for me to respond to Him when my eyelids flutter open. He is there, wanting to hold me close to His heart to comfort me like a new father holds his baby girl. My Jesus places the goal of finishing school and getting a job in my heart for an opportunity to grow closer to Him in the moments of everyday life. There is never going to be another today and there is never going to be another me.

What can I do today, in this moment, to live out the beautiful life God has given me? Life does not start ‘when’…..instead life starts now.

My dear sisters, I am praying that with every breath you take you will see how much God loves you and how much He has planned for you…not just in the future, but in this moment.

Love Always,

Kelsie

You I long for. You I love!

My Princess,

Come away with Me, My beloved Bride, I am waiting to show you the world through My eyes. There’s so much for you to see-don’t miss it, My love. Let Me enter into your world and get close enough to whisper treasures of truth to your spirit. I am here extending My hand to you. Will you place your hand in Mine and let your Prince guide your way today? I want to take you on an extraordinary adventure with Me. I just want to be close to My Princess today, to love on you.

It’s about us today, so hold on tightly and don’t let go.

Love,

Your Lord who wants to be near you

A Love Letter

“It is true. I stand at the door of your heart, day and night. Even when you are not listening, even when you doubt it could be Me, I am here. I await even the smallest sign of your response, even the least whispered invitation that will allow Me to enter.

Whenever you invite Me, I do come – always, without fail. Silent and unseen I come, but with infinite power and love, and bringing the many gifts of My Spirit. I come with My mercy, with My desire to forgive and heal you, and with a love for you beyond your comprehension. I come – longing to console you and give you strength, to lift you up and bind all your wounds. I bring My light to dispel your doubts. I know you through and through – I know everything about you. I see you walking and laughing with your friends. I watch you fall asleep at night. Do you not yet recognize My love?

  

I paint you sunsets. I spill moonlight onto your face at night. I explode a brilliant sunrise into a glorious morning for you. I warm you with the sunshine and perfume the air with natures sweet scent. I am the smile that brightens your day. 

I know what is in your heart – I know your loneliness and all your hurts – the rejections, the judgments, the humiliations. I carried it all before you. And I carried it all for you, so you might share My strength and victory. all you have sought outside of me has left you only more empty. Do not cling to the things of this life. Do not run from Me when you fall. Come to Me, I wait for you. I will give you strength. I will give you hope. I will give you joy. I will show you how to love that you may experience an incomprehensible peace.

Always know that I love you.”

~Christ

Courtesy 101

I’ve heard stories of disappointed cashiers attempting to serve a customer who is checking out and talking on the phone at the same time…you see it all over!  A couple weeks ago I saw a man standing outside the grocery store talking on his phone.  Only after having completed the call did he enter the store to shop.  I was impressed and it made me take note.

So what should one do when it’s so easy and comfortable to be “technologically rude?”  I set some goals and guidelines for myself:

1. When I am visiting someone…I am with them so my phone is off or on vibrate and in a place where I am not distracted by an incoming call or text.
2. When I am by myself…done visiting…I check my messages and return calls in a timely manner.
3. If I am with someone at leisure and I get a call that I need to take, I try to excuse myself, keep the call short and am sure to return my attentions to the person I am with.
4. While I may answer the phone or make calls in stores, once I am in the check-out line my focus is on the person helping me.

Have you ever heard or sung that little song: Love is something, when you give it away, give it away, give it away, Love is something, when you give it away you end up having more.  It’s just like a magic penny, hold it tight and you won’t have any, lend it spend it and you’ll have so many, they’ll all fall over the floor! ?

That’s the beauty of common courtesy…at first it’s hard because we are not used to it and we think we may miss out on something.  But if we stick to it we will reap rewards that will make us wonder why we didn’t think to begin sooner and before we know it we lose count of the many blessings it brings!

Stay Off!

Take this time in your life to just rest and be with Christ.

Rest with Christ

Become HIS perfect girl!  Singleness is not some example of purgatory that we have to go through while we wait for that guy to come along. It is a beautiful gift to do things that you can’t do once you are married. Many women who are unhappy with being single later discover they are unsatisfied with being married because they didn’t do all the things they wanted to do while being single. Rejoice that God has placed you in this place, in this time, with this obstacle facing you. Whatever it is, He is preparing you for a magnificent future! We have such a sense of entitlement in our hearts. We believe we deserve a good man, which we do, but remember, a spouse is a gift from God. Do we deserve gifts? No. They are given to us out of His mercy and love for us. We need to switch our thoughts from ‘I’m a good Catholic woman. I go to Mass. I pray. I’m pursuing Christ! Why hasn’t this right man come into my life yet?’ to ‘Jesus, I desire You. I love You. If You decide to not bring a man into my life, then that is okay because You are enough for me.’ In the end, He is all you need. Be completely satisfied in Him.

So stay off the roller coaster

– Stop using your brothers to get emotional highs. Pray your Rosary to ask your Holy Mother for her intercession. She is the most beautiful woman who understood that God was the only man allowed in her deepest, most sacred chamber of her heart.  When you do find yourself day dreaming about that guy or you are tempted to check out his Facebook, pray a Hail Mary.  With our culture today, I know I have said it before, we are bombarded with images of what love is supposed to look like. That is NOT real love! Real love is based on sacrifice and selfless giving up of oneself for the good of the other. Dr Ted Sri said it best when he said, “Real love in marriage is not sitting there staring each other in the eyes saying, ‘Honey remember the time when we did this and this? Oh how I love you!’ It is the nitty-gritty life that doesn’t stop moving, and it’s the ‘Honey, I’m cleaning up vomit over here, could you change the baby’s diaper? Oh shoot and little Johnny had a runny nose!’ Real love is not the Titanic!” Real love is two people coming together for the good of another.  If you don’t practice that now, how can you begin to understand it when you are married?

Begin to think of your brothers with a pure mind; with real love – the love of Christ.

Jenne

References

Eric J. Keroack, M.D., FACOG and Dr. John R. Diggs Jr., M.D., “Bonding Imperative,” A Special Report from the Abstinence Medical Council.

Sarah Swafford,
http://jamieleigh126.blogspot.com/2009/10/emotional-chastity-love-emotions-taylor.html

And amazing conversations with amazing FOCUS missionaries – men and women

Dressing with Dignity

Besides just affecting us, the way we dress also affects those around us. For example, a 16-year-old girl decides to wear a tight shirt and a mini skirt to attract the attention of a cute boy in her class. She does not realize however, that her 45-year-old teacher who is married with three children, notices her promiscuity and becomes tempted to lust after her. Also, the fifth-grade, hormone-crazed boy decides to stare too long at her while she walks in the hall.

As women, we naturally desire for affection and love. However, by dressing immodestly, we receive attention that does not value us as a person but rather degrades our dignity and worth. This “love” is fake and is rooted in selfishness and use. By dressing immodestly we are actually encouraging others to view us in this way.

My boyfriend Jared has been such a blessing to me by making me more aware of the image I portray to others when wearing low-cut shirts.  Once we started dating and he saw more of my wardrobe, he had the courage to tell me that he preferred me wearing higher-necked shirts so it wouldn’t be so uncomfortable for him and myself.  When I wore shirts like that, he was always so painfully mindful to not let his eyes wander and it was a terrible temptation for him to control, even if he only wanted to have an innocent conversation with me.  Because I love him and don’t want him to suffer more than is necessary, I chose to comply with his request.  He respected me enough to look beyond his own selfish desires and let me preserve my purity.  Now, THIS is the kind of guy you want with you the rest of your life.  And believe me, they’ll notice you for your self-confidence and virtuous habits, so don’t bother wearing shorty-shorts and skin-tight tank-tops.  It only harms your chances of reeling in a “keeper.”

After reading this, we hope that you are encouraged in the battle to dress modestly. So the next time you have the urge to wear a tight shirt remember your dignity and protect your heart from those who do not deserve to enter into that sacred chamber.

Stacie

A man’s perspective………………….

Womanly Dignity

“What do you say to a modestly-dressed woman?”

———————————

“Your dignity’s showing!”

With the warm weather coming out, girls tend to show more skin and wear less clothing. It keeps us cooler and is also more attractive to the guys, so why not?

     As women, we should always be mindful of what we wear and how it affects those around us. More importantly, modesty is an outward sign that portrays an inward sign of security, love and respect for ourselves and others. By dressing modestly we show others the dignity that women inherently are given by God. We demand more than the attention that our bodily appearance gives on its own. We challenge others to love us for who we are, rather than for what we look like. On a more practical level, modesty also benefits women because it allows us to be comfortable by not being limited in how we can move without exposing more than what should be shown.

Before I met my fiancé, I struggled in some ways to dress modestly and I did not understand all of the affects it had on myself and those around me. Immediately after starting a relationship, I felt the desire to dress more modestly. I believe this is because every woman knows inside that to be truly respected and loved by ourselves and others, we must dress in a way that conveys that message. Not only am I happier and more secure than I have ever been, but my fiancé as well is so thankful for the way I choose to dress.

Katie

A guy’s perspective………..

“Modesty is not only an ornament, but also a guard to virtue.”

You Are Wanted

To be desired…

It was the day I had been waiting for and the day I was dreading. I had spent 1 whole year on a fast from the one thing I wanted most…a courting relationship. In order to establish relationships with students, teammates, and mission partners, first year missionaries go on what is called a “Dating Fast”. We commit ourselves not to date for our first year on staff with FOCUS. I had been nervous to come off the dating fast. I had become comfortable with having a ‘buffer’ around me. I was not available, now, the guard was coming down, but why was it scary? I had spent a year learning how much Jesus desired my heart. Now I had to learn how to believe I was desirable to a good young man. That should have come with realizing how deeply Jesus desired me, but it didn’t.  I knew coming to training there would be a certain young man who would be asking me out on a date, and I knew I would say ‘yes.’ Why was I afraid? I began to pray about the tension in my heart only to realize I did not trust our Lord in my relationships with the men around me. I have never dated, so a relationship still scared me. What if he didn’t know what he was doing? What if we both couldn’t figure it out? As I prayed, Psalm 91 came to mind. Jesus would protect me. He wanted me to trust His plan, not mine. My heart surged with the desire to be wanted and the YES! I wanted to give it that young man. I was ready, but where was he?

Slowly, the questions, the overanalyzing, and the insecurities popped into my mind. ‘Was I not the girl he was waiting for? What was wrong with me? Could this whole little crush been completely false? I must not be pretty enough. I must not be desirable.’  The devil was filling my head with lies. Why do we women want to be desired in the core of our hearts? This question now pops up even more close to my heart than before.

The longing to be desired was meant for Christ to desire our hearts, but in our world, that longing has been twisted. We begin to place that longing to be desired on anything, men, talents, jobs, friendships, etc. It can manifest itself anywhere! The devil is very cunning and loves to trip us up. Time and again we fall into this lie of not being good enough, of not being wanted. BUT this is far from the truth. As a beautiful daughter of God and bride of the Prince of Peace, you are desired. Scripture tells us, “I will betroth you to Me forever; Yes, I will betroth you to Me in righteousness and in justice, in loving kindness and in compassion, and I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness. Then you will know the LORD.” (Hosea 2: 19-20)

How do we untwist our desires? First find a mentor. As fallen creatures, we need an example to follow. Who can we follow? As women, the perfect example we can follow is our beautiful and loving Mother, Mary. She gave her heart to God and allowed Him to have complete control of her life. She trusted Him with her heart, mind, body, and soul. She knew above all else that she was desired by her Father.

Archbishop Fulton Sheen said it best:

“Every man who pursues a maid, every maid who yearns to be courted, every bond of friendship in the universe, seeks a love that is not just her love or his love but something that overflows both her and him that is called “our love”. Everyone is in love with an ideal love, a love that is so far beyond sex that sex is forgotten. We all love something more than we love. When that overflow ceases, love stops. As the poet puts it: “I could not love thee, dear, so much, loved I not honor more.”

That ideal love we see beyond all creature-love, to which we instinctively turn when flesh-love fails, is the same ideal that God had in His Heart from all eternity – the Lady whom He calls “Mother”. She is the one whom every man loves when he loves a woman – whether he knows it or not. She is what every woman wants to be when she looks at herself. She is the woman whom every man marries in ideal when he takes a spouse; she is hidden as an ideal in the discontent of every woman with the carnal aggressiveness of man; she is the secret desire every woman has to be honored and fostered; she is the way every woman wants to command respect and love because of the beauty of her goodness of body and soul. And this blueprint love, whom God loved before the world was made, this Dream Woman before women were, is the one of whom every heart can say in its depths of depths: “She is the woman I love!”

Pray to Mary for purity of heart and purity of desires. Ask Jesus to open your heart to being aware of His desire for you.

Jesus will pursue you. He loves showering his brides with compliments and flowers. He wants you to open your heart to His pursuit. Give him permission to pursue you.

You Are Beautiful

“A beautiful and chaste woman is the perfect workmanship of God, and the true glory of angels, the rare miracle of earth, and the sole wonder of the world.”

Being beautiful is complicated.

     As a woman, I know when I go out in the world I am very aware of how I am being portrayed. I used to be obsessed with making sure that I looked my best whenever thought I would see a guy that I liked. I would spend hours in front of the mirror and look at all the imperfections that someone might see.

After too much money spent on makeup I realize that being beautiful is not as easy as a few licks of mascara and some concealer on that one blemish on your face. No, being beautiful is letting the one and only Man be your guide and show you how you can be romanced. Don’t get me wrong, makeup is not a bad thing, however, when there is too much, people get distracted by the overly done makeup and not the beautiful woman. Jesus loves you most when you are not impressing all the other men around you. He will help your interior beauty radiate if you give Him your heart.

Being romanced by Jesus Christ himself is more important than being romanced by any other man. It is so difficult being single and thinking that the right guy is out there and praying for me.

You want to know a little secret?

   I know a guy who thinks about you all the time. I bet He is planning your future together. You will probably think “this is scary, He is kind of obsessed with me” the truth is He is totally obsessed with you. He is loving you right now and hoping you are thinking about Him, loving Him and dreaming about Him as much as He is loving and dreaming about you.

As a Catholic, I feel beautiful when I have gone to Confession and cleaned my soul. The old cliché “It’s not what’s on the outside, but what’s on the inside that counts” is so true, especially with Confession. Jesus made us women to be beautiful and His Daddy doesn’t make mistakes. You are the most beautiful woman God has ever seen and He is waiting to hear from you and to tell you how beautiful you really are. 

Josie

“A smile costs nothing but gives much.  It enriches those who receive without making poorer those who give.  It takes but a moment, but the memory of it sometimes lasts forever.  None is so rich or mighty that he can get along without it and none is so poor that he cannot be made rich by it.  Yet a smile cannot be bought, begged, borrowed, or stolen, for it is something that is of no value to anyone until it is given away.  Some people are too tired to give you a smile.  Give them one of yours, as none needs a smile so much as he who has no more to give.”

“Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone,
To have a deep soul relationship with another,
To be loved thoroughly and exclusively. 
But God, to a Christian says, 
“No, not until you are satisfied, fulfilled and content
With being loved by Me alone,
With giving yourself totally and reservedly to Me,
With having an intensely personal and unique relationship
With Me alone.
Discovering that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found,
Will you be capable of the perfect human relationship
That I have planned for you.
You will never be united with another until you are united
With Me alone,
Exclusive of anyone or anything else,
Exclusive of any other desires or longings.

I want you to stop planning,
Stop wishing,
And allow Me to give you the most thrilling plan existing,
One that you cannot imagine.
Pleas allow Me to bring it to you.
You just keep watching Me, expecting the greatest things.
Keep experiencing the satisfaction I Am.
Keep listening and learning the things I tell you.
You just wait.
That’s all.
Don’t be anxious.
Don’t worry.
Don’t look at the things you think you want;
You just keep looking off and away up to Me,
Or you’ll miss what I want to show you.
And then when you are ready,
I’ll surprise you with a love far more wonderful than any
You could dream of.
You see, until you are ready and until
The one I have for you is ready
(I am working even at this moment to have you both ready at the same time),
Until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me
And the life I have prepared for you,
You won’t be able to experience the love that
Exemplified your relationship with Me.
And this is the perfect love.

And dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love,
I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your
Relationship with Me,
And to enjoy materially and concretely
The everlasting union of beauty, perfection and love
That I offer you with Myself.
Know that I love utterly.
I Am God.
Believe it and be satisfied. “

"Be satisfied with Me"